


Another Man's Shoes

by csulliven



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Civil War Fix-It, Civil War Team Captain America, Civil War Team Iron Man, Explanations, Gen, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Understanding, team neutral
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-07
Updated: 2018-11-07
Packaged: 2019-08-20 07:47:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16551836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/csulliven/pseuds/csulliven
Summary: Tony just wants to understand why Steve did what he did. When he gets the answer it's not what he expected.





	Another Man's Shoes

**Author's Note:**

> I saw a lot of team Cap vs team Iron Man and I wanted the sides to sit down and talk to each other. I wanted Tony to understand why Cap couldn't sign the accords. Very civil and I probably should have added a fluff tag.

After the fight in Siberia Tony reached out. He wasn’t expecting to and surprised himself when he called. Tony was so angry at Rogers for choosing Barnes, for not telling him about his parents, but most of all for not signing the accords. Everything could have been avoided if he would have just signed the accords. When he picked up the phone and called Rogers it wasn’t out of anger. He expected it be, but it wasn’t. Tony just wanted to understand why Rogers didn’t sign the accords. There’s always wiggle room or loopholes in documents, if there wasn’t Tony never would have been in Siberia. So Tony called Rogers and they met in a nondescript coffee shop in some small town in the middle of a country that did not sign the accords.  
“Why won’t you just sign?” Tony looks at Rogers. He’s trying to understand, but after all of the death that the Avengers have caused why won’t he see reason.  
“People's agendas change. The only people who can make the best decision for us is ourselves,”  
“We would still be deciding, but we wouldn’t be at fault anymore,” Tony knows that’s not completely true, but the blame would be shifted from the Avengers to the U.N.  
“Tony, you know that’s not true. People will still blame us and even with the loopholes our access to help people will be restricted. Lives will be lost while we wait for governments to decide we need to help,” Rogers looks pleading. Asking Tony to understand, but there’s something he’s not telling Tony. Something that if Tony knew he’d understand. Tony does occasionally know when to back down, but this is something he needs to understand. Something that will clarify all of Cap’s decisions, and will make this trip worth it. Something that will change this new strain between them.  
“What aren’t you telling me?” Rogers straightens his back ramrod straight. His face becomes marble all emotions hidden to the casual observer. This prompts Tony to really look at Cap. There are bags under his eyes. Deep, but hidden his own body hiding how tired Rogers actually is. His posture is straight, but Tony can see it’s more than just being stickup. It’s a defense mechanism, just like Tony’s humor. Roger’s face might be marble, but his eyes are pleading. Asking Tony something he can’t interpret. If this was a year ago Tony would have dropped it. He would have made a joke and left it at that, but Tony came all this way to understand, and dammit if he wasn’t going to get answers. Steve seemed to realize it and his posture only got more tense.  
“Tony I have had governments running what I do all my life,” Rogers takes a deep breath before he continues. “Do you know about eugenics?” Tony nods, “A lot of people thought it was mostly a Nazi thing, but it was really big in the 20s and 30s. My mom,” Steve took another deep breath retreating farther behind that marble mask of his. “My mom did everything she could to keep me alive, but we were Irish immigrants. There wasn’t much we could do. We couldn’t get jobs, and I was so sick that when the government decided I shouldn’t have kids there was nothing either of us could do.” Tony breathed a gasp of surprise, but Steve didn’t pause, probably couldn’t, “I thought Captain America would be my way out. I wanted to fight for the people I saw everyday. I wanted to prove that I was just as much of a man as everyone else fighting the war. Bucky did everything he could to convince me not to join, but I did anyways,” Steve got a distant look in his eyes, and Tony wasn’t sure if Steve remembered he was there listening.  
“Doctor Erskine saw beyond my body and limitations and put his faith in what I could do. The only reason everyone else agreed was because I was only supposed to be the first not the only one. After Erskine died I chased down the killer, but the last sample of the Serum got destroyed in the process. He was a Hydra agent.” Tony nods along hearing this story from Howard multiple times a year during his lifetime, “I make it back to the lab and they run tests. Taking blood samples and other tests like that. I went from a sick man child who couldn’t have kids breathe or run to well,” Steve waves his hands in a you know gesture. “I thought after the tests I would be sent into the field. I went through basic training, and now my body was healthy enough, but the government owned me. My choices at the time were between a willing lab rat or a forced lab rat.That is until Senator Brandt showed up and offered me a way to help my country,” Steve sighed self deprecating, “I was young, inexperienced, optimistic, hopeful. I wanted to help however I could so I agreed. I was wearing tights, but I was helping. I put on the showgirl routine. I smiled, I talked, I kissed babies. Seeing the children so happy to see me and parents laughing was the nice part. We were just getting out of the Great Depression though. There was only so much that the citizens could give. So I had impress the rich. I was told to do whatever I could. I compromised my morality for my government. Made me cold calculating great once I got to the field, but as you would phrase it,” Steve smiles at Tony, but it’s a sad smile, “I had a stick up my ass around normal people unless I was actively trying not to. Tony,” Steve looks Tony in the eye before he asks, “How did I get onto the field?”  
Tony knew the answer. Everyone did. “You saved 400 men single handedly,” Steve smiles that sweet, but sad smile that Tony is realizing is not a happy smile at all.  
“I went on that mission to save Bucky. The government told me I couldn’t do anything and they weren’t going to do anything either. It was because some higher up decided those men weren’t worth the risk to save. They had bigger things to worry about. The only reason I wasn’t court marshalled or sent back into the showgirl business was because I was successful in not only saving 400 men but also collecting a sample of a new weapon and blowing up a Hydra base. I was on a team, the Howling Commandos, we were sent to destroy Hydra bases, but did you know the U.S. Army near the end of the war knew about Nazi attacks before they happened and still let them happen. I only had so much leeway. The Government didn’t send my team where we needed to be sent, but also sent us places that could have waited or that we didn’t need to go.” All of Steve’s decisions were coming into clarity. Tony didn’t agree with all of them, but he understands more than wants to. This new clarity of Steve and why he doesn’t sign the accords makes a scary amount of sense, and Tony has to admit to himself he would probably make the same choices if he was in Steve’s shoes and had been through everything Steve had.  
Tony thought that Steve was done, but Steve continued, “I wake up from the Ice and Shield takes over. I was told where to live where I could and couldn’t go. At first I thought it was because I was knew to this century and it made sense, but they had someone watching me. Pretending to be my neighbor. Natasha was sent to do a Psych evaluation on me. That was why we did so many missions together. My only pay was from Shield I had nowhere to go if they decided I was to much effort. So I played the good soldier and worked directly under Fury. Even when I was first introduced to project Insight I didn’t agree, but I went along with it. It wasn’t until Hydra was revealed to be in Shield that I got out from under the Government’s thumb. If you wouldn’t have provided me with the resources I needed, I would have been on the streets, and Tony I am eternally grateful for that. While Ultron wasn’t great and the bombing in Lagos was entirely my fault,” Tony tried to protest, but Steve continued on waving him off, “It was my fault, I should have spotted that bomb immediately, but I didn’t. What isn’t covered is all of the Hydra attacks we prevented before there was even a threat to civilians. So Tony,” Steve looks down at the table, “I understand why you signed, and I don’t hold it against you. Even if I want to,” Steve glances up and smirks, “I hope you understand why I couldn’t sign,” And Tony does understand. It’s all painfully clear why. Tony was hoping that his anger would be justifies. That Steve would keep providing excuses, but now that reality is in the open, Tony can’t hold on the the anger that has been in him since the accordes were first introduced. They sit in silence for what feels like hours before Steve finally meets Tony’s eyes. Tony wants to say something, but doesn't know what. Steve needs him to say something.  
“How's Barnes?” As soon as Steve realizes the question is genuine the reaction is immediant. He uncoils like a snake, but he doesn't relax. Tony watches as Steve slouches in his chair and for the first time Tony see's how exhausted Steve truly is.  
“He went back into cryo,” Tony knew not to ask to many questions. He was curious where Barnes would be able to go into cryo freeze. “He said he was to much of a danger to others with the trigger words in his head. Until he's safe to be around he's going to stay in cryo,” Tony can tell how much Steve doesn't want him to see how much that hurts him, but Tony knows Steve well enough to see the damage Barnes decision is hurting him.  
“I'm sorry,” Steve looks up shocked before smiling. It was the first genuine smile Tony has seen on him in too long. Tony looks down at his now cold drink uncomfortable with the display of emotion. “Ross wants your head on a spike, but if Vision randomly goes offline and I already don't know where Wanda is after the raft randomly broke Nothing he can do about that. And I don't like people keeping track of where I go so if I randomly come to coffee shops in the middle of nowhere no one's the wiser.” They smirk at each other before laughing. Tony was glad that that rift between them didn't seem as far anymore.  
Contact between the Avengers and the Rouge Avengers was nonexistent too everyone's knowledge. Only those who fought aliens together or had a forbidden love affair knew, but that was for the best. Steve continued to save the world from the shadows and Tony continued to blind the government from the good that was happening under their noses. The anger that blinded each group slowly disappeared. Things would never be the same as they were, but the two teams were closer now than they ever were before.


End file.
